Review: DreamQuest

LOL the logo.

(2000)

Language: English

Director: Brad Armstrong

Actors: Jenna Jameson, Herschel Savage, Alexa Rae...

Dreamquest

Dreamquest follows the adventures of  Sarah on her titular Quest to find her missing fantasies from the land of SexyNarnia. Well, the land isn’t really called ”Narnia”, but I can’t remember its real name, so SexyNarnia it is. Sarah doesn’t like when her boyfriend Steven is all horny all the time. So she casts him out for the lack of romance. Because there is no doing the nasty when being romantic, right?

I like romance. And popcorn.

Luckily, two bronze arsed fairies come to to help Sarah in need. Together they go to an exciting adventure of sausages, pies and cream. The way to his archenemy Vladamir (who happens have the hold on her fantasies) is long and moist. As you probably guessed, Sarah is the moist one on this adventure, along with a few other ladies.

Whoah! A pair of bronze fairy asses! I'll take one, please.

I had ONE big problem with this movie. Sarah, who apparently is a romance freak, goes through a mirror with her fairy friends and –poof!- there goes the romance and along comes sweaty lesbian spiderwomanpartying. And near the end of this movie, she is so ready to eat any man-sausage that comes around that she doesn’t wink an eye when her ”boyfriend” sticks one in her mouth. Why? Wasn’t she supposed to be this nice librarian –type girl? Why does she suddenly go all wet on the first sausage/pie she meets?!

Oh. A shiny thing. Must touch.

Weeeeee! Poof.

One plus point in this movie is definitely the amount of fairy action they have managed to ... fit ... in this movie. It’s always nice to see two bronze assed girls do the gatekeeper.

Move along. Nothing to see here.

The music and camerawork in this movie was ok. There were some nice scenes, but sometimes the camera lingered way too long in one place. Also, the music didn’t really stick in my mind in any way. I can’t even remember if this movie had any music in it. It’s that forgettable.

Thighmaster Vladamir. Only for 99$!

Ooh. I like the pretty shiny colors.


The actors did fine. My favorite actors in this movie were the chandeleers or candlekeepers. I mean wow. Talk about a candle with a good attitude. Actually - I could probably use these candles in my restaurant.

More bronze asses. Your welcome.

You see, it’s a very romantic place.

Recommended with a nice chocolade pudding on the side.

*** MovieChef stars!